Iskra Lawrence says she was a “chubby child.” She always loved food, and she says she had a rotund tummy. But at such a young age, it didn’t matter to her. “I really didn’t care because I felt so loved by my parents,” she says.
As she got older, her interest in fashion grew, and she read magazines constantly.

One of them, Elle Girl, had a search for a supermodel contest. Even though she didn’t win, Lawrence was scouted by a modeling agency while she was there, and she started doing test shoots and small fashion shows. “I had a taste for this fashion industry that I loved and wanted to be a part of,” she says. But she realized that even though she was a relatively slim girl, she wasn’t slim enough.

“I remember they would constantly measure my hips like every six months,” she says. “And I saw these other models who I aspired to be, and I was like, ‘Well, clearly I have to try to change my body to try to be successful.’ My body was my enemy, and every day I was going into battle and trying to change my measurements.” It grew into an obsession.

Lawrence would weigh herself every day and take her measurements. She ate less calories than she burned, but she still wasn’t fitting into sample sizes, and she got dropped from her agency. She applied to eight new agencies and was rejected from every one. They said she was either too curvy, or too womanly, or too mature-looking. “You’re always ‘too’ something,” she says.

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